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Category Archives: Family

Tips Parents Giving Advice to Teenager

The short answer to this question is don’t. Now at first glance this probably sounds ridiculous, after all parents have more experience of life and most would agree that a parent’s job is to pass this experience onto their children. But the problem with giving advice is that it’s really just a way of maintaining control. We often cover it up by saying we know what’s best in the situation, we have the experience and knowledge, but in reality what we’re saying is what we want to happen, this is what we want you to do.

Adolescence is a time for learning to self-manage, to take responsibility for yourself and your actions. It’s an essential process if your teen is to become a well-adjusted, fully functioning adult ready for the world at large and a fundamental part of the process is handing over control to your teen.

For most parents this is a really scary thought. They’re concerned about what will happen if they do, that if they give up some control it will mean they lose all control. They’re concerned about what their teen will do or what happens if they get it wrong, in other words they feel a need to protect their teen.

Handing over control at this stage is more about handing over responsibility and accountability on how to do something, not handing over total control. It’s about letting your teen have an involvement in how to solve a particular problem, it’s about teaching them problem solving skills. If you always provide the solution how will they ever learn to do it for themselves?

It’s ok for your teen to get it “wrong”, to make mistakes. You’re teaching them how to self-correct, just as they did when they first learned to ride a bike and kept falling off. Making mistakes is a natural part of the learning process; more learning comes from making mistakes than comes from getting it “right”. How much does it really matter if they don’t get it right first time or choose the best alternative?

Finally, is your solution the best? It’s easy to forget that our children think differently than us when thinking about a solution to a problem. The solution may be the best one for you, but is it the best one for your teen?

Giving advice by telling teens what to do is only one way of passing on a parent’s knowledge, there are other ways of achieving the same outcome and with a higher likelihood of success. it’s how you pass on that experience that makes the difference.

Below are some suggestions on how to get your point across:

1. Ask before you give. Always ask your teen if they want your advice before you start to give it. If they say, “yes please” then go ahead and have your say, if they say “no” respect their decision and keep quiet.

2. Question their intent. If your teen has refused advice , ask them specific questions about how they’re going to handle the situation. Asking questions about smaller parts of the problem is a way to at least get your teen to think about what’s involved.

3. Provide information instead. Directing your teen to a source of information that’s neutral allows your teen access to information without having to agree to your point of view.

4. Give your teen time. Just because your teen hasn’t given you an immediate answer to your question doesn’t mean they’re ignoring it. Give them time to go away and think about the answers.

5. Highlight their qualities. Reminding teens of their strengths will focus their minds on choosing options that make the best of them. Focus on their weaknesses and they’re likely to lose confidence in doing anything.

6. Listen to your teen. Often just listening to your teen without interrupting will show you that you don’t even need to give advice; your teen already has a solution.

Different Parenting Styles to Ensure Proper Child Development

Women who are trying to get pregnant often have lots of pregnancy questions. They read lots of books about baby development and medical literatures that discuss pregnancy week by week development. Unfortunately, most couples tend to neglect issues about parenting styles. If you are expecting a baby, then it is very important to have a clear understanding of the different styles of parenting. The way you raise your baby has a great impact on his or her overall emotional and mental development.

As a future parent, you have a responsibility to nurture the baby inside your womb. You have to take note that the first trimester of baby development is very critical. At this stage, the survival of the fetus is not yet guaranteed. So once you confirmed that you are pregnant, you have to immediately consult your doctor to clarify whatever pregnancy questions you have. Your doctor will also give you a quick overview of pregnancy week by week development. Based on the information that you can get, you will be able to understand how to take care of the growing fetus. Of course, your doctor will also give you competent professional advice about dieting, pregnancy exercise, and the right pregnancy supplements. You have to seriously follow the advices of your doctor to ensure proper baby development.

You may not notice it but your first actions during the early stages of baby development are already part of your responsibilities as a parent. The mere fact that you are getting the best medical care indicates that you are taking parenthood seriously. However, knowing the basic pregnancy questions and child development is not enough to become a good mother. You also need to educate yourself about the right parenting styles. Parenting issues are more complex and require a significant departure from your usual norms and behaviors. To completely understand several parenting issues, you should carefully study the different parenting styles as defined by authoritative development psychologists.

There are three known styles of parenting. First, there is the so-called authoritarian parenting method. The authoritarian parent demands and expects so much from the child. Strict discipline is usually the norm of authoritarians. This style is seldom responsive to the child’s individual preferences. The second parenting method is authoritative-responsive. This parenting style balances strict authoritarianism with responsiveness. It is usually practiced by parents who have experienced the ill-effects of absolute parenting. The most commonly practiced parenting method in modern society is permissive-indulging. Permissive parents allow full development based on the children’s individual preferences. Permissiveness is highly acceptable in today’s society. However, extreme permissiveness may spoil the child thus undermining his or her proper psychological development.

You have to understand the different parenting styles in order to learn how to properly raise your children. As early as the first trimester of your pregnancy, you should decide which type of parenting method to adopt. Remember, the overall development of your child will greatly hedge on the way you raise him or her. Make sure that you have a clear understanding of proper parenting in order to ensure a balanced baby development.

Ways Become a More Successful Single Parent

Professionals are there for the purpose of helping you or your child, so don’t be afraid to ask for help It can be hard for all who are involved, when divorce or even death is the reason for becoming a single parent. How the children are coping with the situation should always be a concern, especially if becoming a single parent was recent. When your child starts having problems at school, or changing while at home, it then might be the time for counseling. You can’t overlook your own needs in this area, either. Quite often you will need more than the help of your friends or your family. With help from a good counselor, transitioning to a single life with your child can go smoother for both of you. As you become a single parent, changing careers may be necessary. For the first time, you may need a true career. There are certain jobs that are more practical and convenient for single parents than others. When you kids get home at 3 from school, an average 9 to 5 job may not fit your needs. Think about jobs in the medical profession such as nursing as they¬†often have flexible hours. Working from home with a job such as online marketing, web design, writing or graphics is also an option. As a single parent, you need a job where your schedule can be flexible and provides a steady income source.

As a single parent, entering a relationship with a new person can be difficult. It can be unclear when or if you should introduce your child to this new person. The most appropriate rule of thumb says that your child should not meet people you have just started dating. Problems can come up including your child being upset if the person isn’t a presence in their life for an extended period of time. Introduce your child slowly to those your are in a serious relationship only. Obviously, if someone is going to form a new family with you, then they’ll have to be good with your kids as well.

Though it doesn’t make it any easier to handle, being a single parent nowadays is not an uncommon situation. A positive attitude is key and will help you to deal with everyday challenges. The things we have talked about should help you handle your single parent life. On top of everything, feel free to ask for assistance.

Tips For Stress-Free Parenting

Here are a few tips on good parenting that will provide you with useful parenting help:

Spend time with your children

Find some time everyday to spend with your children. Having a healthy communication is one of the sure ways to strengthen your child parent relationship. Sit down with your child, play with him/her, take her out for a walk and most importantly, talk to your child. These are the little memories that your child will cherish when he grows up.

If you are a homemaker or stay-at-home parent, you have a wonderful opportunity of being there for your child whenever he/she needs you. Utilize this opportunity to spend time with your child in fun and creative activities, doing homework, watching some good programs or CDs or inspirational videos for children that help your child to develop good values, wisdom and morals.

Communication is essential for parent child relationship

Try to connect with your child as much as possible. Listen to your child, and discuss the things which you used to do when you were a kid. Don’t force your opinions on your child. Rather, try to understand your child’s point of view and be understanding.

Be firm to discipline children

In order to enforce discipline, don’t be cruel to your child. Rather be firm and yet gentle. If your child has made a mistake, then explain to him/her gently. Don’t shout or scold. Yelling at your child for every little thing is going to make him/her stubborn and rebellious and lead to child behavior problems later. You have to be very tactful in this. So be firm to discipline your child and yet not lose your peace and poise.

Be a mentor

Practice what you preach. This is the most important mantra of good parenting. If you do not want your child to watch television during meals, you must also practice the same. If you want your child to spend time on reading and other extra-curricular activities, you must also spend some time on these activities. Similarly if you want your child to eat fruits and vegetables, you should do the same.

In short, children closely follow their parents. Whatever you do, your children will follow in your footsteps. So be a mentor to your child. As they say, “children learn to smile from their parents”. To make your child develop a positive attitude and pursue creative activities and good habits, you must lead with example.

Get children involved in interesting activities

Get your child involved in activities which he/she enjoys such as dancing, music, guitar, swimming, sports and so on. But don’t push your child to do something that he doesn’t enjoy. Let him do what he enjoys the most and always encourage him.

Motivate kids with the help using inspirational videos

You can also spend quality time with your child by watching motivational videos with your child together. Various websites offer motivational videos meant for kids that are specially designed for children in the approximate age range of 3 to 10 years old. They convey essential life wisdom of instilling character and values into children such as honesty, kindness and responsibility. Besides these inspirational quotes videos also provide useful parenting advice on raising children with good values and positive attitude.

Tips Make Sure You’re a Good Parent

Taking care of your children can be a complicated process. While there are many useful books and tips on this subject, several myths also exist. In this article, we will examine some of the best strategies to educate and teach your kids, in order to raise them in the best way possible. Read on.

Show physical affection for your child. Human beings naturally crave touch. Whether it’s a hug or a kiss or just a simple pat on the head, touch can be a great way to connect with and show affection for your child. Touch is especially important when they’re sick or feeling sad, since it will comfort them.

When you’re out an about, make sure you introduce your child to anyone you meet. This helps their self-esteem and gets them used to meeting new people. If you don’t introduce your child, you make them feel invisible and ignored. It’s important that your child feel loved and like they’re part of the family.

If you have a difficult or especially demanding toddler, consider part-time daycare or nursery school. These options allow you maintain most of the control in raising your child, but still get them out of the house. Nursery school can provide a situation in which your child is being cared for by someone who won’t give in to their demands and doesn’t mind if they cry.

Let the baby nurse as long as he is still actively sucking with deep drawn motions. If the baby starts to slow down, hold down on your breast for a few seconds to release more milk. If he is still hungry, this will get him going again. If he does not respond then try switching sides as he may have emptied that breast.

Develop patience when dealing with a breastfeed baby who is trying to learn how to use a bottle. Breastfeeding comes naturally to them and bottle feeding doesn’t. Make it a gradual process for the baby so that they are ready to transition when you are. It won’t happen overnight so stay calm and just keep trying.

While going through a divorce with younger children, it is important to give them only the information that is necessary for them to understand. No excess information should be given to the young children or it could hurt their impression of the parent. Your kids should not feel any effect of their parents divorce, even though they always do.

Learn to breastfeed your baby in public so that you will be able to breastfeed for your child’s first year of life. Mothers who have not learned how to discretely nurse in public tend to start offering bottles and that is usually the beginning of the end of a breastfeeding relationship.

Way to Survive and Thrive as a Single Parent

Being a parent is hard enough. What should they be eating? Maybe you shouldn’t be feeding them those types of foods… those aren’t organic! What fabric softener should you be using? Are you spending enough time with them? Why does my child keep fighting on the playground? These are questions that you may ask yourself every day, and there are times when you might feel like nothing that you do is good enough.

These points are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to parenting, and then there is a whole other side to the task; one that is unfortunately very common- and that is being a single parent. It is never ideal having to face challenges alone, let alone one of them being the insurmountable task of raising another human being! In addition to the financial, physical and emotional loneliness, it can also be hard to maintain a balance between your role as a parent and as someone who has needs of their own.

The fact is that you may have found yourself, through any circumstance, as a single parent. What now? Is it possible to not only survive, but thrive as a single parent too? Of course it is! After all, one of the parts of being a good parent is being a good example, and a good example means a strong, happy parent who survives, thrives and excels beyond that. Here are some tips for surviving and thriving as a single parent:

  • It takes a village… There is an old saying that goes ‘it takes a village to raise a child;’ and this could not be more true. After all, it is hard to survive without any support. However possible, rally people around you and your little ones. Make friends with the parents of your child’s friends. If you can afford it, get a nanny who can spend lots of time with you and your child – enough time that you trust them to help with your child when you have to run an errand or attend an event. If you have family nearby, nurture the relationships. After all, not only will this help you get by in times of need (such as when you are sick, or have a work commitment), but it also brings a lot more love and attention into your child’s life, which is just what every little one needs.
  • Your workplace. Be candid with your boss and colleagues. Make it clear up front that you have a child and are doing it alone. At all costs, do your best to avoid working for a company that is not understanding of your responsibilities. If you have to leave early to attend a parent-teacher meeting, or need to take a day of leave to nurse your sick child, you need to know that your company has your back. If you are working for a larger corporation, or one that is not as lenient as you would like, know your rights. You have the right to take family responsibility leave if your child is sick (although you will need a Doctor’s note), and you have the right to work reasonable hours if you are not being paid overtime. Even if you are a workaholic, do your utmost best to separate your work life from your home life. Your child comes first, and remember, to a child, love equals quality time!
  • Make an effort to have ‘you time.‘ ‘Me time?’ you ask, ‘what’s that?’ Although it can seem impossible when you are so busy trying to work and raise a little one (or ones) all on your own, it is possible and actually crucial that you make an effort to spend time pampering yourself. Hire a babysitter, lean on friends or arrange a playdate so that you can take some time out to meet with friends, go to the spa, or even just to have an afternoon nap.
  • Talk to people. Find someone to confide in. It’s okay if you don’t feel strong all the time, and talking about your problems helps! Even if your friends aren’t single parents or parents at all, don’t underestimate their love for you, and their willingness to lend an ear.
  • Try to further yourself. Even if you can only set aside an hour or so each evening to do an online course or correspondence degree, do something that you feel will help your future. Whether it’s a short course that builds on your existing degree, or taking the time to learn a new language, by learning something new, and being proud of yourself, you will feel like you have some sort of end in sight to your current struggles.
  • Do something you enjoy as often as you can. This should always include exercise! Be active, and get those endorphins pumping! Download exercise videos that you can do in the morning or evening, in the comfort of your own home, when your child is asleep. Go for walks with your little ones and, if you have them, drag the doggies along with you. Read a book in the bath every night; dance while you cook – find joy in the little moments and the simple things. This is your life, and you are living it right now. You deserve to be happy.

Even when you are married with kids, it can be tough to stay afloat, sane and balanced. Being a single parent is another ballgame all together. By following the abovementioned points, you may start to feel like you are not only surviving, but also thriving. But all this aside, remember just how rewarding your job is. Sure, you’re a mom or a dad, and it’s not always easy, but it is worth it. So, the next time that you are feeling overwhelmed, like you are in over your head and barely surviving, cuddle up on the couch with your kid, chat to them about their day and let your heart fill with love. After all, that deep, unconditional love is exactly what keeps you going no matter how hard the going gets.

Ways Choose an Effective Parenting Course

Most parenting courses are bound to fail right from the start. Maybe you have tried some of these programs. Maybe you’ve even read about differing parenting styles or techniques only to be disappointed after. In each case you may have felt as though something was just not right with the material.

Here’s why. Almost all parenting courses that are available involve punishments or rewards, quick fixes or even manipulation. However, these types of courses will not work, or at best, they are only a temporary fix to a bigger, root problem.

Addressing the symptoms and not the problems is the easier thing to do. That is the nature of our quick-fix society today. We want things cleared up now, not tomorrow, and we do not like to wait for things to happen.

There is no quick remedy to parenting. And the right thing to do, by addressing the root of the problem, is emotionally exhausting, and can sometimes feel like a relentless test. But, covering up the root of the problem using a band aid like method is not going to fix the problem, just mask its symptoms. Pent up emotions are bound to erupt explosively, and then there is no training in the world that is going to stop it.

With parenting courses that focus purely on the root of the behavior problem, you will be eradicating the problem right at its source. This in turn will help to support your child’s emotions and growth development in a very positive way.

As a parent, we only want what is best for our children, but by simply addressing the symptoms, we are only damaging their chances of a happy childhood and adult life, thus ignoring “what’s best for them”. By giving your children the tools that will allow them to live a happy and good life, you are ensuring that they will respect you as well as others, and their bad behavior will be just a distant memory.

Remember that obnoxious behavior is the direct result of unexpressed fears and emotions and is a buildup of stress that has not been allowed to be expressed adequately. No matter what their age , you will find that it is never too late to learn new ways of listening and connecting with your children.

Tips For Single Parents To Be In Control Of Lives With Their Children

Managing Stress

Stress will come on when the single parent does not know how to manage it. There are good help books on stress if the single parent has the time to read. Joining a single parent support group is also very essential in coping with stress correctly.

A single parent needs to know how to handle the management of emotional and mental stress; they can be involved in spiritual interactions or meaningful activities such as exercising and hobbies to release stress and tension.

Planning your time

Time is very short to a single parent as there are many things to take care of; work, finances, house chores, children’s health, school, activities and loads of other daily stuff can take up a lot of your time as a single parent. But if you exercise good time management, you can be more productive and effective.

Good time management is crucial to a healthy home for single parents as this trait ensures that you have allocated time for all the necessities in your home to create and maintain a healthy environment of love and growth.

Hence, you can adopt a calendar to note your time management events as well as to re-evaluate better ways of management as time goes by.

Single Parents Support Group

It is very beneficial for single parents to come together and support each other as they have no spouse or even relatives to assist them or share their burdens. When you are all alone as a single parent, the parenting burden can be quite heavy. Hence, it is essential for single parents to meet up with other single parents to share parenting and home building tips than to shy away.

Engage Good Babysitters

A single parent needs time alone for himself or herself once in a while. If you do not have nearby family members or close friends to babysit your children sometimes, hire good and responsible babysitters whom you can trust your children with. Get recommendations from other single parents for good references so that you can enjoy some time off. You may even work out a babysitting plan with other single parents to take turns babysitting each other’s children for some personal off time.

Smooth Out Family Conflicts

Conflict is a element of way of life and is a element of every way of life at some element, whether you like it or not. Many people meet with issue while at execute and it can begin home way of life as well. Associate and partners can see issue among themselves in regards to money or personal issues, such as bedroom issues. With children, the most frequent issues will be in regards to projects or observance of the recommendations.

The best way to cope with issue is by knowing what the very best way is to technique problem. The important element to keep in concepts is to be well-mannered and create the other personal think that you appropriate value their feelings and concepts.

Avoiding problem definitely is challenging, there will certainly be times when aspects will happen to frustrated or anger you and times when you will frustrated or anger someone else. The most important element is that you talk about how you encounter and allow others to tell you how they encounter too. If a problem is increasing and looks like it could probably become competitive, you need to remove yourself from the situation and create a probability to amazing down. Here is a details to efficiently dealing with problem.

Step 1: Awesome It

The first element that you need to do when approaching problem is to comfortable down and technique the problem rationally. Some effective techniques to comfortable down are:

  • Take a few powerful gradually breaths
  • Count backwards from ten
  • Take a walk

Step 2: Identify

The second stage is to be aware of exactly why you are frustrated or disappointed. Be sure that the problem at part is the real problem and that you are not forecasting ill feelings due to something else.

Step 3: Bring It Up

Privately cope with the person who is involved in the problem. Tell them how you encounter, or if you are the person who activated the problem or was wrong, say sorry. Sometimes saying sorry is all that is required to cope with a problem.

Remember to:

  • Be comfortable and create eye contact
  • Allow the other personal a probability to talk about without interruption.
  • Make “I” statements to avoid showing accusing. Example: “I encounter like you do not like me when you carry coffee for everyone else and not me.”

Step 4: Take Some Space

It may be a great idea to take a break from the conversation when:

  • The other personal is becoming troubled or violent
  • The other personal is not passionate about talking
  • You encounter yourself becoming angrier and are having complications handling your feelings.

Whether you are fixing a problem with your kid or with your spouse, the described techniques of problem excellent will help you cope with the problem better. In the example that the problem cannot be resolved among those involved, it may be necessary to obtain the help of an outsider.

How to Single Parents on Raising Children

Raising children as a single parent is one of the greatest challenges that most parents who are managing single parent homes face. The reasons for raising such a family may be varied but the main responsibility for such parents is to provide the most suitable home for the children.

As a single parent it is important to provide a positive environment for your children especially in the home. Most children from single families may suffer from a sense of hopelessness and confusion as they try to come into terms with the new living arrangement. It is therefore important that the single parent be as positive as they can so that the children also have a positive attitude about their future. Always encourage your children in all their activities and remind them that the situation is not because of anything they might have done.

Avoid bad mouthing your former husband or partner especially when you are around your children. Always try and be civil when you meet or when they have to take the children to visit them. The most painful thing that a child has to endure is the fighting between their parents because they do not take sides when a relationship disintegrates for one reason or another.

Involve your family and friends in the raising up of your children. Select people that you trust and are also trusted by your children to be role models in their lives as well as provide a sense of family to the children. The friends that you choose will also be able to support you emotionally in case you need to talk to someone about the challenges you are facing as a single parent.

Consistency as a single parent is very important especially in matters of discipline and general home affairs. Single parents need to have a structured way of running the family affairs so that the children are not confused with changing rules now and again. It is okay to be flexible even as you set the rules of the home so that your children can be disciplined and have fun as well.

When it comes to dating, it is important to avoid bringing every date to meet your children as this will confuse them. If possible, let your children interact with all your suitors on a friendship basis for you to be able to assess if they interact well or not before making the relationship permanent.